Hello!
I have been interested in becoming a Mason for a few years now, however the issue of secrecy has been a bit of a problem for me. I’ve always kind of been of the mind that where there’s a secret, there’s exclusion and unfairness.

I know that my wife would have a much easier time with the idea of me becoming a Mason if she knew what it was I was getting into. I would feel better getting into it if I knew I wouldn’t have to keep anything from my wife.

I just don’t understand the tradition of secrecy and why it is so important, if the secrets themselves are not of any real consequence?

Is it the act of “keeping the secret” what’s important? Why is it so important? Is it having to do with trustworthiness? Because there are other ways to judge that, rather than to have to keep something secret even from those you love.

Masonry is not for everyone. I don’t say this to discourage you from membership and of course it is only prudent to understand something as much as possible before you involve yourself in it. There are brothers on this forum that are far more experienced than I am and so better able to answer the question as to the relevance of secrecy. The bottom line, in my opinion, is that while Masnory is not a secret society we are a society with secrets. This is not going to change any time soon. If it is something you are uncomfortable with I encourage you to explore Masonry as far as a non-member can and then make your own determination on whether the secrecy aspect is something you can abide by or not. If after an honest assesment of your feelings on the issue you decide it is not something you can abide by then Freemasonry is not for you. There is nothing wrong with that. I do encourage you to explore the possibility with your wife though. Your wife’s support is vital.

Your concern is a valid one. Masonry does not wish to cause any marital discord or strife in our member’s families. Once your wife has some knowledge of Masonry, if she is still opposed to your petitioning for membership, then I suggest that you no longer pursue Freemasonry. This being said, I would encourage you to approach Freemasonry, with an open mind. Also, your wife should research the Craft, and make any of her concerns known. You may wish to obtain some of the excellent books that are available (Freemasonry for Dummies, the complete Idiot’s Guide to Freemasonry,etc).

Masonry is not a secret society. Our existence is well-known. Lodge buildings are clearly marked. Members wear rings, belt buckles,etc. Many states have an official Masonic vehicle license plate. It is true, that we have some secrets. One example is the Coca-Cola company. Their company is public knowledge, but the recipe for coca-cola, is a trade secret, and only the top management knows the forumula.

There is definetly exclusivity in Masonry. We exclude atheists, communists, felons, and persons convicted of moral turpitude. We exclude women, and we also exclude men who have not reached the age of legal majority. (Some states permit 18 year old men to join, some states require the petitioner to be at least 21). Some states have a residency requirement, California requires the petitioner to reside in the state for 12 months, prior to petitioning.

In American lodges, the only secrets, are the modes of recognition (certain passwords, handshakes, etc.) even these have been published in books, and are easily accessible on the internet. Secrecy in Masonry is a tradition, that goes back to the time of our ancient operative brethren (the original freemasons, who built the cathedrals and public buildings in medieval Europe).

What masonry is, what we stand for, and our goals, are published for all the world to see. Our charitable activities (estimated at $2.6 million dollars per day), are easily visible to anyone.

I suggest that you meet with some local Masons in your community. You may also arrange for your wife, to meet with the wives of some local Masons. I believe, that after a careful study, you will find, that the traditions and practices of Masonry, will not be detrimental to your marriage relationship.

You should know that there are several appendant and concordant bodies, which sponsor activities for the member and his wife. The Shrine (an organization which requires Masonic membership, as a prerequisite), has many dances, dinners, cruises, etc. for the member and his lady.

You may find, that after joining Freemasonry, that your marriage is enhanced. My wife thoroughly enjoys the Shrine-Hillbilly club. We dress up in bib overalls, and have covered-dish suppers, and have country dancing.

I wish you well, regardless of your decision.

There are other Freemason appended bodies as well. Then there are groups out there that are not appended, female oriented and co-ed. But I understand that Freemasonry does not sponsor those 2 options directly. Sometimes with a veiled nod of existents and other times it’s a hushed back turning. Depending on location again. And yes worded that fairly carefully to avoid promoting or putting down. Neutrality.

If you don’t mind my asking BC how is your own inquiry into Freemasonry going?

JasonM - 16 July 2010 02:35 AM

There are other Freemason appended bodies as well. Then there are groups out there that are not appended, female oriented and co-ed. But I understand that Freemasonry does not sponsor those 2 options directly. Sometimes with a veiled nod of existents and other times it’s a hushed back turning. Depending on location again. And yes worded that fairly carefully to avoid promoting or putting down. Neutrality.

I’m not sure what female oriented or co-ed Masonic organizations you could be referring to that are given nods of existence.  Perhaps you could clarify?

I’ve always viewed it more as an expression of trustworthiness.  The same confidences you would extend to any friend who would just like to confide something in you privately without it becoming public knowledge.  If you become known in your circle of friends as someone who does not keep confidences well, your standing in that circle of friends is diminished.  That’s all the secrets of Freemasonry really are testing, that you can make a promise and stick to it.

The ones that when asked about them you kind of hang your head and mutter under your breath that there are groups that call them selves by those names but Blue lodges to not recognize them.

Hi Jason

Thank you for your continued interest in the Forum—though it does seem that you are replying to a lot of old threads that have sort of run their course. We keep most threads open in case people have new information to add. But since any new posts bring a thread to the top again, it’s important to make sure that you are either bringing up a new question or adding something to the knowledge base—rather than just making a comment.

I did want to add a comment to this particular thread direction.

Not sure exactly what you meant by your last comment, but since this is a Grand Lodge sponsored Site (and just for clarification for those reading) within the Grand Lodge structure itself there is no “head nod” of recognition. The recognition of Grand Lodges, Blue Lodges, and Appendant bodies around the world and within states is actually very structured. An Appendant body is either recognised or it isn’t. Certainly any body itself can have it’s own club or subgroup—such as a Ritual Club or a Wives of the Lodge Club, but these are not recognised appendant bodies as far as Grand Lodges are concerned.

Thank you again for your participation.

Bob Heruska
Forum Administrator
Boston, MA

I was thinking of analogies and other things to clarify my statement above. Which i thought was pretty clear. They exist, we know they exist, some people prefer they did not, others could care less. Either way they are not officially recognized by grand lodges. They were one of the many reference’s i ran across while researching Freemasonry and how my own wife would take the secrecy.  Next time I’ll use the Private mail system on the forums so i can be more blunt and less evasive.

JasonM - 16 July 2010 02:45 PM

I was thinking of analogies and other things to clarify my statement above. Which i thought was pretty clear. They exist, we know they exist, some people prefer they did not, others could care less. Either way they are not officially recognized by grand lodges. They were one of the many reference’s i ran across while researching Freemasonry and how my own wife would take the secrecy.  Next time I’ll use the Private mail system on the forums so i can be more blunt and less evasive.

Why bother.  Be blunt.  If you are talking about co-masons or another group, name them.  There are no rules against that.  Bottom line, there is NO recognition of a group that raises women as Master Masons, ever.

Jason

I apologize for feeling like I need to step in again, but I’m afraid you are leaving an impression that there is something secret and evasive that we are trying to hide. There is not, so I am hot sure what you are getting at. If you are more comfortable sending a PM to discuss this, feel free to post me or Dan. Otherwise, I would prefer that you tell us what you are talking about so we can make any necessary corrections and/or clear up any misunderstandings.

Also, your posts indicated that you are have been an entered apprentice since January. In most jurisdictions you would have received further light since then.

So I am a bit concerned.

Bob Heruska
Forum Administrator

Not to worry. As i stated some where on this forum or thread, I forget which, I wanted to pay my lodge dues and degree fees first rather then with each progression. That took waiting for taxes showing up. This coming Monday at 2pm i will be meeting with 2 brothers to pass off the degree work and then find out when we can hold a called communication or if we wait until September when the lodge lights up again. July/August are dark months.  Hmm I clicked the submit post on the Fast reply window and got taken to a “post reply screen.” Its been doing that all day.

[Edit]  Also i find that posting something to older threads some times prompts the origonal poster to update with new information. Such as http://www.masonforum.com/viewreply/4192/

Title: Research Paper
Message:The paper went very well. I made a 98 (the highest she would give
was a 99). I did not get to intervew the 33 degree mason, he was out of
town, but I did get to talk to him afterwards. And yes I would love to let
people read it. I guess it would be best to send it in a message because it
is very long. And thank you so much for all the information. :D
Lindsey

Got a call Saturday morning around 10 am saying lets do your run through at 1. So i go over and i see the 2 other gentlemen arriving at my mentors house to sit in on my recital. So when park and go in, i find out the lodges Worshipful Master just happens to be over helping/doing a project and was just headed out the door so he sat in as well. Long story short with the lodge being dark in Aug. I’ll have to wait till the 2nd or 3rd week to do the 2nd degree. Some brothers are out of town that normally have parts so i can’t do it this month like i had hoped. Then in Sept when we open again i should be ready for the 3rd if what i am hearing is correct about it only gets slightly easier to memorize as i go on.  Maybe I’ll double up on my studying and go for my general license for Amateur radio operator as well. Give September a workout.

73’s i now leave this thread. Unless of course BC gives us an update :) .

There is nothing wrong with having to wait between your degrees.  In fact, I think it makes the process more meaningful.  Something that would be a great use of your time over the darkness would be to ask for a cipher of the EA lecture.  Spend some time decoding and reading through it, contemplate it, do some outside research as to how these things you experienced in EA originated.  You may even consider learning a portion of it to deliver for the next EA that comes through the lodge doors!

I received my welcoming letter in December of 2009 saying show up to lodge the 18th of Jan 2010 and you will receive the 1st degree. The ritual was conferred and I went home with a home work assignment and the working tools paragraphs. A couple of days later i met with my mentor to go over the answers and he left a cypher. So i’ve had one since late Jan. My lodge allows you to pay the $50 per degree and when you get your rd degree you pay the yearly due of $70. I was unemployed back then and chose to wait till i could pay cover it all and then get back on schedule. So if all goes well i should have the 3rd Deg in Sept.

Having said all that the time indeed give me more time to spend going over the work and absorb it more and reflect.